Aroo! Dis Banjo heer. Today I tell yoo about mah weekend in Austin, Texas.
We staying wun-too-free nites wiv hoomin frends, da Lipmans. Furs, I tell yoo hoomins very happy becoz last time they seeing Mister and Missus Lipman, I iz a puppy. And now Lipmans haz two littol hoomins, chew! So iz a long time, becoz I a big dog. I four yeers old.
Den, dere is Dog Lipman, Elijah. He eleben yeers old, so he wise… but he a tuff guy! He not let me neer Lipmans babies and sniff stinky diapers, but letting me play wiv his toys. Dis a big fun!
Lipmans living wiv a park. Dis weh I like to go to play. Dere is a sand to dig, and a toys to play wiv, and a grass to do tinkles on:
Bud wen I do a tinkle, Elijah do a much bigger wee to say he boss. Well, I a Shyhound, but I younger and stronger, so I do more tinkles! But den Elijah sez he da boss of dis house, so he olso gets to eat my fuud, chew. Dis I not like, but I a Shyhound – yoo can eet it, ‘Lijah!
On da fird nite, Elijah challenge me to a wateh-drinking contest. He sez he can drinks more wateh than me. I sez, we’ll smell about dat! and we drinking aaaaall da wateh. Hoomins not seeing dis. Dey tokking and laffing togeva. Den Mister Lipman sez I has big drools. Den mah hoomins wurry becos I look like a otter, wiv drools hanging off mah wiskas.
Iz not feel nice, all dis wateh. But Elijah sez big dogs not puking, so I holdz it in. Dis make my belly feel big and sad. Bud then I do a big, big wee, all over Elijah’s tinkle, heh-heh-heh! Bud he win wateh contest, so I say owkayyyyy, yoo da boss, Mister Elijah!
Heer is me and mah buddy, Elijah, in his rrrroooootiful park: